My boat is called destiny, and I steer the ship.
How to become decisive? It is so important to make our own choices and decisions in life, that way we steer our own ship. Of course there are times when we compromise as we collaborate with others. We make that choice to collaborate and we should never feel pressured into it.
Every time we make a decision, we are moulding our lives in some way. We may even make the decision to change direction completely. Therefore we begin to forge a new path for ourselves. We are fluid within the ebbs and flows of life, but we aren’t just splashing around in the current. We have a life raft to ground and steer us.
I do believe that sometimes going with the flow is beneficial, when we hand over our concerns to the universe after we have exhausted every avenue. But how much better does it feel when we do this for ourselves? So much better!
The First Step
The first step to becoming our true and authentic self is to learn how to make decisions for ourselves. Without letting the fear of judgement cloud our path. Have you ever decided to do something, only to change your mind because someone judged you?
This is a common practice among many people, myself included at one point. When we do this we are essentially handing our power over to everyone else and therefore are unable to reach our full potential. I am about to share with you an exercise to help you see why making decisions are important, and how you can do it easily.
Exercise: The life line review.
What you will need;
• Piece of paper
This exercise will help you to see clearly times in your life that your decisions effected your life. Before we can start making clear decisions we must first understand where our indecisiveness comes from.
What to do:
- On a piece of paper draw a line horizontally across the page. This line represents your life, and so is your time line.
- On the time line draw vertical small lines mapping out each 5 years of your life. For example if you are 50 years old you will have 10 markers along your time line.
- Now think about the life events that have happened along this time line and mark them with a (+) or (-)
- You may mark (+) in the times in your life that you felt you made positive decisions. You may mark (-) for times that you felt you let others decide for you.
It is important to note here that there is no judgment attached to this timeline, you should view it as objectively as you can.
When your time line complete you will see scattered across your life line markers of (+) and (-). Showing that there were times in life that lifted you up, and times that were challenging. You had to make certain decisions along your timeline, but may also see times in your life where your lack of decision making effected your outcomes.
This exercise will show you that at certain points in your life you had to make difficult choices. Perhaps you had to leave a toxic relationship or walk away from a situation or habit that was not healthy for you. You may look back on this time in your life with a hint of sadness, but it is also a time of strength.
You see, often in life the toughest decisions we have to make, are the milestones for tremendous change!
Many of us shy away from decision making because in the past we have experienced pain with making tough choices. We tend to remember the uncomfortable conversations we had to have, but often forget to celebrate the growth that came from those decisions. Some of the most indecisive people I had met, have been those who have had to make the most difficult and often life changing choices.
The first step in becoming more decisive is to own your past decisions. I hope this exercise helps you in doing just that!